Sunday, June 26, 2016

Snippets - I

“Do you think all bosses are crazy, or do I just have rotten luck?”
“Both.”


“I just thought, after what happened last year with the quitting, the sabbatical, the new job, that I wouldn’t have to make any more decisions for a while.”
“But you’ll always have to make decisions now. Personal or professional. That’s adult life.”


“What am I supposed to say?”
“You know, random shit.”
“What random shit? How do I ignore the elephant in the room? Am I supposed to bring up that he’s my potential husband? Chosen by my parents?”
“Um, I don’t think so.”


“Hi.”
“Hi.”
“Um…”
“Um…”
“Sorry I couldn’t talk earlier, I was on a deadline.”
“No problem. Are you home now?”
“No, I’m still at work.”
“SO LATE?!!!”
“Um, it’s 8.15.”


“Hi.”
“Hi.”
“Um…”
“Um…”
“Had dinner?”


“Hi.”
“Hi.”
“Um…”
“Um…”
“What's up?”
“I’m out with friends. I’ll talk to you later.”
“Oh, great. Out where?”
“Social.”
“What’s Social?”


“I can’t marry him, mumma. I don’t even want to meet him.”
“Why? He seems nice.”
“He doesn’t know what Social is! How is that possible?”


“Will you help me buy baby clothes for someone?”
“Of course!”
“And also something for the mother, to say sorry for being such a crappy friend to you for the last six months.”


“I’m sorry I’ve been such a crappy friend. I’m sorry I’m seeing your baby for the first time when she’s almost a year old.”
“I thought that you didn’t want to talk to me, because I have a baby and all. Because I’m practically another generation now.”
“Don’t be silly. If anything, you’ll think my problems are lame, now that you’ve given birth to another human being.”


“When was the last time you saw A?”
“I don’t know, last month? We went out for dinner with a couple of other people from journalism school.”
“Was R there?”
“No, he didn’t come because he and I were fighting.”
“I have this weird feeling, like how are other people still breaking up and patching up when I’m up all night changing diapers.”


“Did he really say that?”
“Yes.”
“He used the word defective? He said if you’re not married by 27 people will think you’re defective?”
“Yes.”
“What an asshole. I’m so angry your friend is married to him.”


“Do you think I’m defective?”
“Of course not!”
“Yeah, of course not.”


“I don’t want to meet him, Papa. There’s nothing impressive about him.”
“Okay, don’t worry. Let me call you back.”


“Don’t meet him. Say no.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, you have to marry him. If you don’t want to meet him, don’t.”
“You’re not angry?”
“Are you crazy? Of course not. Nobody is going to force you to meet anyone.”
“Oh.”
“Are you crying?”


“I’m so homesick. I’m so upset. I’m so cranky.”
“Do you wanna go home?”
“God, no.”

1 comment: