I think it’s a testament to how chill my life has been for the last two-and-a-half months that when something just slightly inconvenient happened today, I had to go to sleep to keep myself from tearing my hair out. Even then, after I woke up I binged on the most amazing namkeen ever created. Then felt horrible about my existence for about two seconds. I was a little surprised at just how upset I was that a phone call got rescheduled.
Or it could have been the fact that I was running on just five hours of sleep. There was a time when I didn’t need anything more than four hours. I could work, party, dance, fight - with time to spare - and I used to laugh at those listicles suggesting that in my mid or late twenties I’d need six hours at the least. Turns out listicles aren’t all bullshit.
I recently won Rs 4200 in a contest. A weight-loss challenge at my zumba class. I’ve never won anything in my life, not even a toffee. So this was huge, and not just because it had to do with weight.
Or it could have been the fact that I was running on just five hours of sleep. There was a time when I didn’t need anything more than four hours. I could work, party, dance, fight - with time to spare - and I used to laugh at those listicles suggesting that in my mid or late twenties I’d need six hours at the least. Turns out listicles aren’t all bullshit.
I recently won Rs 4200 in a contest. A weight-loss challenge at my zumba class. I’ve never won anything in my life, not even a toffee. So this was huge, and not just because it had to do with weight.
My trip to the hills is fast approaching, but I need to tie up a few loose ends before leaving, including but not limited to finding a skirt that will not look awful while I dance to Nagada Sang Dhol on the 22nd. I don’t understand why we have to do ALL of Deepika’s steps. They’re awesome and awful.
I spent the last few days trying to figure out what my dream job could be. I thought my last job was my dream job, and it really delivered. Until it stopped. Now, I feel directionless in terms of what my calling is. Does it matter? Should I be worried? All these questions were giving me a headache, so I stopped thinking about them. I was so worried that my life would end when I quit, and it didn’t. That’s given me this bizarre sense of courage to throw caution to the winds. For real this time. So I stopped thinking about all these super important questions and dedicated two days to making my resume. I’d forgotten what it’s like to bury myself in a project that didn’t involve marathoning TV shows.
Because I can’t seem to stay away from drama, I’ve spent the last several days and nights caught in the middle of a terrible fight between two friends. Or a friend and a something else. It sounds terribly dramatic, and if my brother (who’s here) is to be believed, it’s terribly exciting to witness, but I’m kinda done with picking up drunken phone calls at 3am and then being guilt tripped for the last five years. WE HAD AN UNSPOKEN AGREEMENT, I want to yell, like Ross and his we-were-on-a-break line. But I’ve come to understand one thing. After you break someone’s heart, you aren't allowed to win with logic.
Speaking of my brother, he and I had this strange confidential conversation the day he came home. I always thought we were close but turns out I was wrong. He was in trouble, which wasn’t as bad as he thought it was but it was a lot more horrifying than anything I could have imagined for him. We slept at 3 that night, after he told me about his girlfriends and I told him about my exes to make him understand how love at 21 doesn’t always end well for everyone and how that's okay. He’s the same age as I was when I started this friends with benefits arrangement that blew up in my face a month ago. Even so, throughout the conversation with my brother, all I could think was, ‘What are you even talking about? You’re so young!’
I spent the last few days trying to figure out what my dream job could be. I thought my last job was my dream job, and it really delivered. Until it stopped. Now, I feel directionless in terms of what my calling is. Does it matter? Should I be worried? All these questions were giving me a headache, so I stopped thinking about them. I was so worried that my life would end when I quit, and it didn’t. That’s given me this bizarre sense of courage to throw caution to the winds. For real this time. So I stopped thinking about all these super important questions and dedicated two days to making my resume. I’d forgotten what it’s like to bury myself in a project that didn’t involve marathoning TV shows.
Because I can’t seem to stay away from drama, I’ve spent the last several days and nights caught in the middle of a terrible fight between two friends. Or a friend and a something else. It sounds terribly dramatic, and if my brother (who’s here) is to be believed, it’s terribly exciting to witness, but I’m kinda done with picking up drunken phone calls at 3am and then being guilt tripped for the last five years. WE HAD AN UNSPOKEN AGREEMENT, I want to yell, like Ross and his we-were-on-a-break line. But I’ve come to understand one thing. After you break someone’s heart, you aren't allowed to win with logic.
Speaking of my brother, he and I had this strange confidential conversation the day he came home. I always thought we were close but turns out I was wrong. He was in trouble, which wasn’t as bad as he thought it was but it was a lot more horrifying than anything I could have imagined for him. We slept at 3 that night, after he told me about his girlfriends and I told him about my exes to make him understand how love at 21 doesn’t always end well for everyone and how that's okay. He’s the same age as I was when I started this friends with benefits arrangement that blew up in my face a month ago. Even so, throughout the conversation with my brother, all I could think was, ‘What are you even talking about? You’re so young!’
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