I need something to happen. Something good. I am a pessimist, and I've been told that this is going to lead to my ultimate downfall, so here I am, trying to put what I want out in the world. I want a win. I want to feel like I haven't lost the last decade to a series of bad decisions - at work, with men, at home. I understand that this means I have to make certain changes in my life, but the lack of motivation cannot be my problem alone. Okay, maybe it is. I'll fix it, or I'll at least try to fix some part of it. But, other than that, please, my God, something needs to happen.